Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Ha ha ha!





Sorry guys, I had to put something else up here because I was sick of looking at that hairy back!

Beer anyone?

Anyone?

Bueller?

Friday, February 13, 2009

Crappy Valentine's Day!

Here are a few things to get us in the mood for this crappy holiday...







Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Jewfro



Well, since we were discussing hair back there, and I've indoctrinated some into the wacky world of the Jewfro, let me just let the rest of you in on it.

Jewfro. Well, what is it? I'm sure you've guessed. It's an afro on the head of a Hebrew. It can be deliberate or cultivated, but let's face it, we of Jewish persuasion in many cases just seem to have a natural tendency toward it. And don't let them fool you, women have it, not just the menfolk.

Jewfro is a great way of showing Jewish pride--it's like a special not-so-secret handshake. However, it can also be the very bane of one's existence. I personally have braved many's the hairstylist in my time, to deal with Jewfro. They all "fixed" my hair in such a way as to tamp down my very essence--the last time being in Chinatown, where, memorably, the horrified lady shook her head at my frizz and proceeded to iron it to a curtain of swinging silk--but what do you think happened the next day?

Angry Jewfro, back with a vengeance.

My latest hairstylist, as I mentioned below in the comments, was the first ever to encourage me to embrace rather than reject my Jewfro, albeit in more shapely and tame form. God bless her.

So Jewfro. Love it? Hate it? As a Jew, there's not much you can do with it but love it and nurture it to the best of your ability. I've reined my hair in a bit, but someday I dream of sporting a full Jewish natural...

Move it along buddy...

Looks like a damn jungle!
Someone, please write a new post.
I'm sick of looking at my stuff.
~
Thank you.
~
Additionally, my much loved
Leo
Your Personal Guide To The Future
nearly met it's demise when it fell into T-Bone's water bowl.
Fortunately it was saved, but now terribly wavey.
If I'm reading it correctly the following is true:
"Loyalty is one of your best character traits.
You always show extreme loyalty to your pals
and expect the same treatment in return."
~
Okay, so I've been loyal.
Now I'm asking you to move it along
because I'm not supposed to be here.
I can't leave if someone doesn't post
something new.
XO
;)

Saturday, February 7, 2009

A good mistake...

This was not the post I planned for the Wild Onion. That post is on my blog. How it got there, I have no idea, but it's there, so I'm here.
I've been meaning to write this one for some time. You know how I love quotes, well I also love day books. These are from Simple Abundance ~ A Daybook of Comfort and Joy written by Sarah Ban Breathnach. I just adore it because most of the time it makes me laugh. I love it so much I bought two. One for me and one for my sister. I wish I could afford to buy it for everyone I love because it's worth it!

Ahhhhhhhhhh...our furry little friends.

I love anyone who understands and artist.
My dad once said, "Creativity is in all of us, if we just make the time." I believe that.
God, you all know how I love Edith Wharton!!!!! Oh, and also my hair. ;)

I don't wear makeup. Thank God. Dr. P said yesterday, "Well this is going to be easy (as she cut into my skull), no makeup. Oh, and by the way, you have beautiful skin." I love that woman!
I adore this quote. It always reminds me of home and family.
~
That's it folks. Hope you enjoy, learn, smile and think. I have a precious little book of days from the late 1800's I bought on eBay. I'll share some of it with you in the coming months because it's absolutely darling. I try not to open it too much for fear it will fall apart!
XO

Wednesday, February 4, 2009


I'M HOT
THE SWEAT IS RUNNING DOWN MY BACK
THE BIRDS ARE SITTING OPEN BEAKED
THE HOT AIR MANAGES TO INVADE EVERY TINY CREVICE
AND THE WEEKEND IS SET TO BE HOTTER

Sunday, February 1, 2009

Have you ever wondered?

Have you ever wondered what the real reasons are for insomnia?

Have you ever wondered what your dog dreams about?

Have you ever wondered what it would be like to be the opposite sex during an orgasm?

Have you ever wondered why Doritos taste so damn good?

Have you ever wondered why you like some people, and others just give you the Heebie Jeebies?

Have you ever wondered what it would be like to have a threesome?

Have you ever wondered what I would be like Drunk? (Trust me, I"m a whole lot of fun!)

Have you ever wondered what it would be like to take acid? (I have, but never had the nerve to try it. Always too afraid of the consequences.)

Have you ever wondered what the real difference is between dog people and cat people?

Are there squirrel people too? What about rabbit people, and ferret people? (Me personally, I'm a people people.)

Have you ever wondered why the word people looks so weird. (It really is an odd looking word. Who the hell came up with this word? PEOPLE. I am totally freaked out by it's spelling right now.)

Have you ever wondered what it would be like if the world really was flat instead of round? Would we fall off the edge like people thought we would, our would it be like a revolving belt on a tread mill and we would just roll on over to the other side?

Have you ever wondered what makes the sky blue? (Well, I actually know what makes it blue, but I"m not going to explain it here in the frame of mind that I'm in.)

Are you wondering if I'm drunk right now? (I'm not, just waiting for some codeine to kick in.)



Ok, I'm done. But seriously, have you ever wondered? Perhaps I should take hydrocodon anymore.


Also, as an after thought, I thought this video would be a great addition to this post. Unfortunately, I couldn't embed it into this post, so you'll have to follow the link. You can thank me later, Bob.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-d4-pDw_dHw