Sunday, May 31, 2009

Another day...

I just realized there are seven cats sleeping in my studio. How is that possible? Oh right...because there are 13 so some had to end up here.
Just to update you, T-Bone did a dandy. I was sleeping the other night. Apparently really well. FINALLY!!! He opened the slider in the family room to get out. Doing so, he let out all the kitties. Everyone came back except Phatty Foo Foo and Picasso. Hummmmmmmm. It's been three days. Phatty Foo Foo's going to be a mess with all that long hair.
*Mommy rolls eyes in head.* Will it never end?

Friday, May 22, 2009

New Menu Item


Enjoy our new French Fry Coated Bacon on a Stick! For those with a hearty appetite and high cholesterol, this meal is sure to pack a punch...but be sure to have those defibrillator paddles nearby, and Alka-Seltzer!

Eat up!

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Who Let This Guy In Here?

Don't we have some rule against something like this? Where's a bouncer when you need one?

Monday, May 18, 2009


What an interesting journey this has been. I was in the forest the other day feeding my ferals and saw yellow. In a forest ravished by wild fire, yellow is important. Color is important. I walked back and found this little darling. Why would a sunflower be in the forest? Probably because I feed the birds sunflower seeds!! You know me by now, I think about stuff like this. I wondered if I'd imposed? Then wondered if I'd made a difference? I don't know the answer. All I know is a beautiful sunflower bloomed in the woods and I got to see it. I feed kitties who need me. The skunks come, the squirrels, the birds, the deer. They've change me. I'm different than I was 2 years ago. My whole life has changed.
P.S. I'll tell you what else has changed. My navigating skills. This was supposed to be at Rose Cottage. What the hell am I going to write over there now? I think I need a beer. I don't even drink beer.

Saturday, May 16, 2009

My Old Stomping Grounds...

My grandparents owned one of the most beautiful homes in the area. Very old, very lovely. My grandfather died, then my grandmother retired from nursing and moved to Arizona. The house of course was sold. First to a lawyer from NYC, then to an artist (a very successful artist). The artist put up a 2,000 square foot studio. It's almost as big as the damn house for Chirst sakes!! The property went up for sale about 2 years ago. I went on the virtual tour, everything. I wanted that house. My entire family wanted that house. Everyone except Dad. Dad grew up in the house and felt no connection to it whatsoever. I remember asking him why. He said "I've already lived in it." I said "Dad, wouldn't you enjoy coming to Thankgiving or Christmas there? You must have fond memories?" He replied, "They're memories. I've moved on." What's up with that? My wacky dad.

I didn't get the house. It was over a half million and I stopped looking because I couldn't sell this one fast enough and after calling the zoning committe realized I couldn't turn the art studio into two rentals because local zoning forbid it. However, I could subdivide the property (3 acres), turn the art studio into a home (at great expense) and sell it for about a half million! *Suze buries head in lap and rolls eyes in head.* God, please help me. Life is often so damn complicated. Is anything still simple? Anything?

I covet one thing in that room. The table, front and center. I have an insane love of tables (oh, and chairs as you all know!). Especially rustic, folk art sorta, kinda tables. It's so pretty and just the right colors. Do you see how beautiful aqua is? Yup, me too.


Tuesday, May 12, 2009

all going well, my boy Liam is going to China on a school trip in October. at the first information meeting tonight there was a lot, and i mean a lot, said about how boys and girls will have separate accommodation, about how there will be constant supervision in hotels, about how nobody will accidentally end up in the wrong room.

it was hilarious. on a high school trip, by a government school, this stuff goes without saying. i would never even question it. that is how i would expect it to be.

i know it is tempting. i know some might test the boundaries but not for a second would i even bother to ask about the policy. we all know the policy. dont we???????

just before the flight leaves i would dearly love to run breathlessly up to my boy, waving a box and loudly say "you nearly forgot your condoms"

Friday, May 8, 2009

Party Time Again!!

May 9th is Gig's birthday. So to celebrate her and her profession I have made her a new sign to advertise in front of the salon. Karen, you can borrow it when Gig isn't using it if you want to.

I tried to plan something spectacular, like parachutists floating down to the ground holding a banner that read HAPPY BIRTHDAY, GIGGIE!!!!!! But unfortunately, one guy had a little mishap and the whole thing ended up as a disaster. I taped the whole thing so I'm sure you all will see it on the next episode of Real TV.

I thought about having a party for Gig at the school cafeteria, but after reading their sign, I changed my mind.

But I did dip into the till here at The Wild Onion and took out enough money to buy Gig a birthday gift.

Good luck charging up your new batteries for the battery charger, Gig.
So have you all heard the good news about Pizza Hut?

I think they are making pizza special tonight, just for Gig.

And of course, what is a party without the party favors.

I tried my hand at baking, but as you can see, things got a little out of hand. It was all ok until I tried to light the candles!

One of my neighbors was gracious enough to try and help me put out the fire. Eventually we had to call 911.

So after it was all said and done, I was able to salvage this nice little flower cake for Giggie's birthday. Happy Birthday, Gig. I LOVE YOU!!!!
After all of the partying is over, don't forget to get RC's remedy down below for the hangovers.

Help for Hangovers

Seems we've been partying it up quite a bit here at the Wild Onion Cafe. I brought some Hang Over Tea to help.

Now, doesn't that just make you feel much less nauseous-and-like-your-head-is-going-to-explode?

You don't have to thank me.

Monday, May 4, 2009


I know how much you enjoyed the floating candles in the beer, so I found some more and made one just for you!

In celebration of Bob's unofficial official birthday, and Cinco De Mayo, we have brought out the traditional Mexican fair. We have pinatas for party favors.

And what is a celebration without fireworks?

And dancing ladies?

And avocado and chips?

And margaritas with a little salt?

And tostadas?

And nachos?

A little beer and lime?

And of course, we cannot forget the party hats. I call dibs on the blue one.

So let's fire up the party and rock! Hope you have a great Unofficial, Official Birthday Bob!!!!

Sunday, May 3, 2009

Happy Birthday Karen!

But I'm sure you don't mind.

I think you will find a little something from all of us inside this Birthday post.
Suzanne found this basket o' kitten for you and knew that you would just love it. She also attached a sweet little birthday wish to it.

I found this in the mail box. I think it was left for you by one of your secret Mates. I don't know, it seems a bit creepy to me.

Megan, and Bob managed to find some floating candles and put this masterpiece together for you. That way we know you won't forget to drink irresponsibly!

I am pretty sure I ordered a cake. It was Gig's responsibility to get it.

Kylie, can you sniff out the cake?

"OH there it is!" Way to go, Leah! You found the cake. But why are you suspended above the table by a cord?

We all hope you have a wonderful day!