Thursday, August 28, 2008

Wild Onion's European Vacation

Our friend Blottie fooled us into thinking she was taking a vacation in the south of France. Today she let us all know that she isn't going overseas for the month. So I decided we should all go together...


We will fly first class of course.

We can go see the Eiffel Tower.
We'll go to the top and look down on the locals!

We'll go the Louvre.
Let's bring some of Suzanne's art
and hang it ourselves.

We'll visit the French Riviera.

We'll dine on authentic French Cuisine.
Damn, those portions look really small.

We will hit the wine regions of France.
Suzanne can be our designated driver.

We'll go sightseeing in the French Alps.


The ladies can go shopping for French fashion.
The guys will check out the French models.

It's a Labor Day, three-day long weekend, so we'll have more time together. Don't worry, Jorge can take good care of the Cafe while we are gone. We can leave him french fries so he won't feel bad about missing France.

31 comments:

Megan said...

Those portions may look small now, but after nineteen of them with wine in between, you'll be glad you came.

Vive la France!

Cecile said...

Oh La La, I think it would be a great idea!.

INNER VOICES said...

*smuggles flask on board airplane. shares with pilots*

Random Chick said...

Oooo, I would look fabulous in that teepee outfit!

I'm ready, let's go!!!

just bob said...

Megan... If it tastes good, I'll eat my fill of almost anything.

Cecile... Too bad it is too far and too expensive to make it happen :(

IV... That's why they're called spirits... they are meant to be shared.

RC... I'm sure you look fabulous in everything!

Kirsten said...

Don't you mean, "freedom fries"? :)

Suzanne said...

Okay, I'm on board. I'll pay for Cece, kids and hubby. Hell, isn't this virtual money? Okay Cece, start packin' cuz apparently Bob's expense account is payin' and I'm chargin' this to him.

Wow Weeeeeeeeeeeeeee...Paris. The Eiffel Tower, the Louvre (make note to drop off painting), then on to more gentile surroundings where we can relax, sip some wine, eat little things and enjoy one another's company and let me drive. "Whoops...left lane or right?" "I see a B&B up ahead, let's pull over. Hummmmmmmmmm. 20 people, three beds. That's gonna hurt. Get off my side you bitch. No really, GET OFF!!! How many people can you fit on a queen sized bed? About 3. 3x3=9. Okay, 11 extras. That's gonna hurt.

XO

Megan said...

I don't mind sleeping on the floor. But then, "passing out" can be done in many a place...

Suzanne said...

Megan, I do believe Bob planned ahead. I see lots and lots of sleeping bags. But honestly, I think 4 to a bed might work. But you have to have a plan. Why? Because Robyn and Gig are brutal! They'll kick your ass just for fun. Okay, here's what you do. Sneak in under the cover of darkness. They'll never see you. Pick a bed. Any bed, then hop in. Be pushy if need be. You'll be fine and survive undetected for 3 days. Trust me. Hell, I don't even see you.

Suzanne said...

Okay folks, it was obviously past my bedtime last night because I was not in my right mind. New day, new plan. This is virtual money, so lets stay in the most gorgeous hotel/resort we can find!!! Any ideas? Oh, and we get our own room!

I'm trying to write this while doing housework and chores. I just returned from moving the sprinkler and got a faceful of Nelson's Turbo. I didn't realize it had changed position when I set it down, so man did I get clobbered at close range. I'm soaking wet, but still laughing because seriously, it was so funny. It felt wonderful too because it's been way over a hundred degrees here the past few days.

Yes, we do have an irrigation system, but I'm not using it in the back yard currently (long story). And yes, I know I'm not supposed to water in the middle of the day, but the yard it so huge it takes forever to get it done. Trust me, I do my best.

God I need this mini-vacation.

XO

Leah said...

I've got my toothbrush and lipstick packed, and I'm ready to go! I like the new plan, Suzanne. No sleeping bags for us. How about a gigantic suite in that first-class hotel. Or, better yet, we can rent a castle! With staff to feed us and draw baths!

Suzanne said...

Bonjour Madame Leah!

I've got my toothbush and limp balm (whoops! lip balm) packed, and I'm ready to go too! Nope, I don't even where lip stick. Nor to I "wear" it. Nor "do" I wear it. God, this is bording on pathetic. I'm a little tired. Hope I can find the plane. Hell, hope I can find the next sentence.

I'll take either accommodation. Both sound deliciously GORGEOUS and I'm ready to be pampered. Great idea. Oh, and what will I be driving? Something a long the lines of a mini-bus? I'd like to request a Mercedes mini-bus or van. I've become very spoiled. So if it's in the budget, thanks in advance Mr. Money Man.

Well Leah my dear, I see you've been waiting since the wee hours of morn for this party to get started, but MMM has neglected to show up or prepare the pilot for take off. Do you think IV has something to do with the delay? Did he really get the pilot drunk? And where are the tourists? I thought I was late. Apparently I'm early. Do you think they forgot it's only a 3 day holiday?! Jeeeezzzzzzzz.

*Crosses arms, taps foot and waits for airport pick-up.*

Suzanne said...

That was me. Thought I was on IV's blog.

Cecile said...

Opps! I deleted your delete. Sorry Suze.

just bob said...

Where's Blottie? I know she got on the airplane. Did she go off on her own?

Suzanne said...

You vwr I sis. Also, you bet I did!!! What the hell is wrong with me fingers today!? Oh and Leah's with me. And so's the pilot. He's a keeper! Well frankly, he's the only one who speaks French and without him we're basically screwed. He's a young man but seems attracted to older chicks. Sorry Leah, don't mean to include you, but, well, you are getting up there.

Vive le France!!! And without extra luggage we're traveling in style. A Mercedes. Too bad you missed the boat. Errrrrrrrr, plane.

And Cece, delete, delete, delete. I love it!!! I adore a clean white canvas. ;)

Gig said...

"Did I miss the plane?" I hurried to get here, only brought a small carry on, cuz I figured we just would just purchase whatever we need as we went, or justbob would have it delivered...

So, when does the next virtual plane take-off?

*looking for the VIP Lounge...sees I.V. lurking outside the door with his never empty magic flask...opens VIP door, goes in to wait for new flight*

Suzanne said...

GIG!!! No honey, you didn't miss the plane. Bring your carry on and enjoy the ride. We're on our way. Leah has made spectacular arrangments at the other end. dddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd. Whoops, that's the kitty. We're going to have a blast.

XXXXXXOOOOOOOOO

Suzanne said...

Honey, can you bring the disco ball?

Suzanne said...

So that's it? I'm here alone? Don't even talk to me. I'm off to the the resort for some rest and relaxation.

just bob said...

I'm here... out by the pool in the cabana soaking in some sun and dining royally.

Suzanne said...

I'm here too, but with the cabana boy. I'm going to egnore you for 1 hour while I get a bit of R&R. You're LATE!!! Oh, and while I'm at it, I'm not giving up the Mercedes or the resort. We'll have to come back to enjoy the rest of France at a later date.

just bob said...

Another woman ignoring me... there's a big surprise!

Suzanne said...

Oh stop. If you'd been on time you'd have gotten the glory!!! I love you, you know that. I'll be with you in a few minutes. Just have to wrap things up in my cabana! Obviously I'm multitasking.

Let's go eat and you chose. Remember, I'm a vegetarian so be kind to animals.

XO ;)

Suzanne said...

Bob, are we the only two people blogging today?

just bob said...

All I know about French cuisine is french bread, french toast, and french fries. Perhaps you should be the one to order tonight!

Suzanne said...

Okay, I'll order french bread, french fries and french toast for you and a salad nicoise for me.

Wow, we went all the way to Paris for that!? Hell, we could have gone to San Francisco and had the most extraodinary day of our lives!!! Okay, from now on, I'm in charge!!! No, just kidding. Let's enjoy our meal and relax under the Eiffel Tower. Aren't the lights pretty? Oh, and I went to the Lourve today and they took my painting. I didn't quite understand the French, but think I was told "That'll look pretty in the basement." Ugh. That hurt. But when I'm dead, I expect it to be hung in all it's glory. Hey, a girl can dream!!!

Love you dear. I'm writing this while listening to Amy Winehouse. You know me, I listen mostly to piano and classical, so she's special and so are you. See you back in the States.

XO


Thanks for this mini-vacation. So happy I made the effort. I'll be back.

just bob said...

Better to be in the basement than the outhouse! France has been grand so far. I'll let someone else plan the next virtual vacation.

Suzanne said...

No honey, you planned the best. I had the time of my life and want to come back. Thank you. No, I didn't fit everything in, but eventually will. And don't worry, you will always be invited. Like Peter, you are one of my dearest friends, and having you near is a blessing. I adore you beyond measure. Thank you for this one.

Love you,
Me

XXXXOOOOOOOOOO

Leah said...

Oh wait, are we on our virtual vacation? I knew something felt different...I didn't realize I was in France! Wheeee! I think I'm spending most of my time here wandering the gardens of the palace. Bob and Suzanne, would you care to join me to watch the butterflies and sip some cocktails?

Do you know that I've never been to the Louvre? Sarge and I last time just gave it a miss. Instead we went to the Musee D'Orsay. Amazing museum, much more manageable. Want a little day trip? Oh, and we must must go to the Ile de la Cite for pear sorbet, and the ladies have to stop at one of my fave parfumeries, Anick Goutal. Need a refill of Eau d'Hadrien and Mandragore

Ah, France...

just bob said...

Leah... thanks for being to tour guide on our last day here. Please pass the Cabernet.