Monday, October 20, 2008

Nerds Gone Wild



Over at CSI's Place there's been a nerd competition going on the past few days. It's hilarious and accompanied by unseemly photos, and if you've missed it, well, head over there pronto for a good giggle. Now I'd like to invite all nerds to come party at the Wild Onion. We've always been a safe haven for people to let their freak flags fly, and now I suggest we all let our nerd flags fly to the music of Weird Al Yankovic. Bring your own nerd snacks, and your platform boots and Princess Leia hairdos and join the party. The only cover charge is one quick admission of your nerdliness--tell us one thing about yourself that you feel suitably reveals that inner nerd.

C'mon, don't be shy, we're all friends here!

43 comments:

Leah said...

I'll start us off. Evidence of my true inner nerd works right here at the Cafe! Anyone who knows me knows that I have a delusion of reference for Severus Snape. Yes, I like him like that and I know he likes me back...Severus...stop hiding behind the bar and come kiss your girlfriend!

Yes, I am a nerd.

And I'm bringing Nerds candy and pigs-in-blankets to this shindig. That seems suitably nerdy to me.

Unknown said...

Leah, thanks for the invite
...this seems like a pleasant-enough place. I like the garlic-scented candles, and the wait-staff's surly attitude!
But, I must warn you all. I’m a shape-shifter! At will, I can change my appearance into a common, ordinary geek. Anyone here wanna see my new thermodynamics calculator?
How’s ‘bout a round of Dungeons & Dragon?!

Suzanne said...

Oh dear God, Randy's here too? Severus honey, can you get me a drink? Something simple sweetie. Use your imagination.

Leah, take off those damn glasses and get serious. Nope, can't stop laughing. Randy, et al., you here too honey!!! Congrats. Brian's never ventured foot in this place. He's a sissy. The whole Cafe theme started on his blog when he went on vacation or something. We took over his blog and I don't think he's ever forgiven us. You haven't forgiven us have you Brian? Oh right. He was studying for some stupid test and we had to amuse ourselves. So we did. This is the culmination of all that brain matter. Yup, just go back about 5 or 6, 10 or 12 posts. You'll see. Yup, we're all really, really smart and I like wearing green and my friend likes wearing red. We also like really chucky platform shoes and red dress likes showing off her boobs and passing them off as her shoulders. What?! It's Chistmas. Right? Oh, and IV likes naked ladies. Hell, I think everyone here likes naked ladies.

XO

just bob said...

OK, here's my nerd submission:

I was in the Math Club in high school. Please don't laugh so hard you spew beer through your noses. I am not cleaning that up.

Suzanne said...

Wow. That's really sexy Bob. So what? 1+1 = 2? What???!!! Oh, by the way, I had a dream about you last night. No. Don't even get me started.

just bob said...

Gee Blottie... you pour a woman a beer and she dreams about you. I never knew it was that easy ;)

Suzanne said...

Good Lord. I don't even drink beer and look how easy I am!!!! Hi honey!!! Wow. You got all that packed in there? I kinda like that.

INNER VOICES said...

im down for some old school dnd... i do remember my last character had a shield of bashing... can i bring it!?

just bob said...

No bashing in the Cafe... the sign on the wall says so. IV, you can bring that shield in, just put it in the corner next to Suzanne's pink tricycle.

Megan said...

I go to Renaissance Faires in costume.

I have a Tim Sale Spidey print hanging in my hallway (bought long before he painted Isaac's Heroes canvases).

I play Munchkin. My favorite card to get is the Chainsaw of Bloody Dismemberment.

I own the complete works of David Eddings and Terry Brooks.

More?

just bob said...

Wow Megan, that's a real outpouring of geekness. Welcome to the club!

Suzanne said...

Holy Shit Megan!!!

Megan said...

Real Nerds think I'm a poser...

Suzanne said...

On a real nerd's blog you probably are. But here you're the real deal. Hi honey!!!

Why am I up this late? God, will someone please stop this stupidity? No one will ever read this so I'll just write it here. I'm 49 and while putting on my nighty, the lighting was absolutely perfect and I swear to God I saw myself naked for the first time and loved me. Wow. I look that good at almost 50!!! Holy crap!!! You know ladies, we all beat ourselves to death about our body, but I'll tell you a little secret. I think it's all about lighting. Keep it low and simple. You'll be good to go!!! Yes, I know it'll be tough to get through and entire day that way, but do the best you can.

;)

Suzanne said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Suzanne said...

That was me. I posted twice because this stupid comment page screwed with me.

kylie said...

jeeeezzzzz suze,
if you're damned hot get to bed and..............
do bed stuff.
remember to take off that bloody coat, it needs a wash anyway. i'm surprised it doesnt walk about on its own
xx

Suzanne said...

I'm gonna kill you when I get my hands on you. You are so nasty

Damn you woman.

Suzanne said...

Wow...doin' bed stuff!

Suzanne said...

I think I can do that.

Suzanne said...

I think I need Walker!

kylie said...

i'll smother you with my shoulder-boobs before you get close enough to kill me

Suzanne said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Suzanne said...

I had to delete!!!

just bob said...

Go to bed Suzanne.... :)

Suzanne said...

I know. Can you believe I'm still up? Insanity. Good morning honey!!! I think Kylie's making pancakes. Yes, I have to go the the freakin' DMV today. Time to feed the kitties. Gotta go.

XO Blottie
Have a good day at the office. Of course I'm laughing.

Suzanne said...

When anyone called me "Suzanne" I know they're serious. What?

Suzanne said...

Also "calls me."

Hi baby.

INNER VOICES said...

DAVID EDDINGS, terry brooks?!?!? didnt they write the original dragonlance books... read em... several times....

Anonymous said...

Whew!

I thought I was gonna see a bunch of topless Nerds flashing their boobies. Thank GOD that wasn't the case!

Evidence of my true inner nerd is that I LOVE to play video games...especially the ones where I get to nuke Aliens.

DIE YOU F*ING ALIEN!!! DIE!!!

Anonymous said...

OMG!!! Is that a nerd boobie Kylie!

ACKKKK!!!!!!!!!!

Leah said...

Megan and IV--Terry Brooks, we've got 'em. How about Katherine Kurtz? Truly embarassing...

INNER VOICES said...

Was i the only one to fountainhead more than once?


*wonders if anybody else enjoyed it as much as he did*

Cece said...

I'm sorry, I have all of you guys beat for sure. In my spare time,(ha)I read my Medically Important Fungi Textbook for fun. I get excited when I see a cluster of MRSA strain typing patients and I spend hours looking at and compairing their graphs on my days off. I also put open dates and my initials on all the condiments and lunch meat in my fridg. Yep, I"m a nerd and Damn Proud Of It.

kylie said...

no cece,
dates on jars isnt nerdy, its just plain SICK :)

kylie said...

hey RC
is a nerd boobie the same as a shoulder boobie ??

we really should get MJ to do a tutorial

Suzanne said...

That nerd shoulder still looks like your nerd boob. That is such an interesting photo and optical illusion. Is anyone else confused by that?

Hi honey! I'm back! What a freakin' day. I have about 2 seconds to type, so listen quick.

Cece, you're nutty. And yes, a true nerd. I think you should be the one in green. I'm not worthy. And frankly, I can barely walk in those shoes even though I grew up in platforms in the 70's. I'll tell you a funny story someday about school. We lived close by and had to walk through the woods, over the soccer field, down the hill past the baseball and hockey field, then dip our toes in the football field. Finally...school. We were always late, so rarely walked, always ran through the woods in those stupid platform tan sandles. God I have some good stories. We had a special name for what took place. I'd see one of my sisters after 1st period and she'd say "Sent Sailin' Suzy?" Because I'd be all scratched up and bloody after tripping over a tree root at warp speed.

IV - nope. My goal in life was to read every classic novel before I died. I'm screwed. That isn't a classic, is it? Good. One less to read.

RC - Hey wise ass, nerds are getting sexier. Perfect example, me and the tramp in red! We have no taste in clothes, shoes or jewelry, but we have great boobs. Kylie...on the count of three. 1....2....*everyone closes eyes.* "Hi Kylie." "Hi Suze." "Nice boobs." "You too."

Leah - that's really your mom, isn't it?

Gotta boggie!

Megan said...

Just wanted to say I laughed my ass off just now reading these comments. Buncha weirdos! No wonder I like it here!!

:)

Suzanne said...

I need a refreshment. Anyone here? Bob? Ahhhhhhhhh hell, I'll serve myself. Pours self a drink.

Hi Severus. What's up honey? Where's our darling lazy boy? Okay, let's go sit on the sofa and watch him dance.

"If you want my body,
And you think I'm sexy,
Come on darlin' let me know..."

Skeeter said...

You all make me feel right at home here. I have a technology related job and have a very good time working for the Evil Corporation with my nerd brothers and sisters. I've got a box of Twinkies in my desk drawer (thanks to a well stocked bakery thrift store a few miles away). We never run out of geek-fuel in the office.

Would anyone like one? Delicious golden yellow cake with creme filling?

Queen Goob said...

....I just need a beer.

Cece said...

A beer and a valium would be nice.

Queen Goob said...

A beer, a valium, and something chocolate.